Oh, the missing is deep today. The dreaded question, "So does Dylan have any brothers or sisters". I just dread this question. I can't say no, I did that once and it hurts worse than just saying what it is. I stumble over the words that I want to express because I wish so badly for them to not be true. Yes, he does have a sister, she passed away in October. I say it like its just a fact, just like that. The pain is screaming inside my calm voice. Then the look, the look on their face just makes it worse, I see the tears that swell up. Then I feel like I have to console them. Today I longed for sippy cups, onsies, cheerios, a dirty diaper, a sweet laugh, pink, the lemon face I want it all, I want runny noses, sleepless nights, tummy aches, teething...things that I hear mom's complain about, (which are no doubt "complain-able") I want. I want to join in on the conversations of all the baby woes. I would take those baby blues over mine any day! I miss my Kelsie Sloane so very much.