As we drove away that night in that old turquoise mustang (I think it was a mustang?) you held my hand and we just smiled. Our lives had been sealed with the commitment of better of worse and in good times and bad. We made a vowel to God to love one another and live in the sanctity marriage till death do us part. I believe that promise to still be true. Did I ever imagine that our bad times would be this bad? Oh hell no, I thought we would fight over finances, struggle with the changes that each of us might go through, never did I imagine that the loss of our daughter would be part of that equation.
Married for just a year and a half it feels like our Marriage has not even begun and we are faced with something so tragic and so unbearable. Now we find ourselves working through this newly found grief that neither one of us can truly wrap our hearts around. My words, my feelings, as you know have never come easy, and now even though I know that is something I have to change, I struggle. My dearest Jeff, I can say this without hesitation, you, my love, have made me a better person. I have learned to trust you, to love you, and to cherish you. Those three things I have never been able to do with another. No one has ever worked so hard, and loved me so unconditionally as you. I thank God so many times for allowing me to open my heart to this man who loves Star Wars, keeps an old Tron poster hanging in his office, and laughs at jokes that I will never get. I am sure that most marriages will not experience the "bad" times as we will over the next several years, but I also believe in my heart that we will choose LOVE and we will Love each other right through this. Someday I will look back on this post and I will know you deeper than I ever have and will have a found a love in you that tragedy will never break. I believe I am your beautiful wife and I know without a doubt that you love me because you show me! I pray that you know that you are my faithful, loving, funny, giving, husband whose hand I will hold for better or for worse and whose lips I will kiss everyday!
I Love You
~Summer
I believe with my whole heart everything you said in this blog is true. I pray everyday for you and Jeff seperately and for your marriage. I tell everyone that Jeff has something that you have always needed, since he came into your life you have had a peace noone else has been able to give you. Love is the greatest thing God has given us and the love you two share for Kelsie noone else will, that is yalls to keep forever and ever!!!
ReplyDeleteYou made me laugh and cry with this one Summer! I love the part about the Tron poster and the jokes you'll never get. (Hah, Nathan too!) But Jeff is a special person with a huge heart, and you are what he needs too, because you are steady and strong and brave. I believe in you guys, as individuals and as a couple. You will get through this together. -Jessica
ReplyDeleteI believe with all my heart when you choose Jeff you choose Love. A love that most only dream of. I have said before and will say again, I have the most awesome son-in-laws a mother could ever hope for. Jeff, I love you more than you will ever know. You are the best husband and daddy, I know I do not have to worry for Summer or Dylan, because they have you to love and protect them. I thank God for you everyday. all my love mom-sheila PS it was not a mustang, but it was a beautiful car!
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