Friday, March 2, 2012

Answered Prayer

I am not the type of person to put myself out there and make new friends.  I like my old ones.  They don't live here but they are comfortable and they know me flaws and all.  Well after Kelsie died I read many books on grief and one common theme rang true through out all the books.  "Summer you are going to have to put yourself out there and build a community of support for yourself"  Dallas is 8 hours away from most of my family.  I have one sister and brother n law here and a sister n law and brother n law.  Each of which have been the best supporters anyone could ask for.  Beyond that I do not have any family here.  So in the midst of my grief I knew I was going to have build new friendships.  I prayed that God would help me do this.  I am a very home body person, I only have a few friends that I call on weekly basis so this would be quit a leap of faith for me.   So I first began researching grief groups.  I thought this should be easy in Dallas TX.  Not so much.  I was very specific in my search, I wanted a faith based group that I knew I could share my journey with without judgement.  Through many phone calls and links taking me to different links I found A Hole in My Heart.  I spoke with Autumn, the founder, and thought "wow, the founder of this ministry called me personally and still calls me".  I then made it to a meeting.  What a blessing it was to share with other women.  I then went on a retreat with several other bereaved mothers and now just like Job in chapter 42 I have been blessed ten fold on friendships.  I have a friend that I had met sometime ago through Dylan's baseball team, she offered to run a race with me and now we meet every Tuesday to pray, to listen to each other, and dive into God's word.  My neighbors have been an incredible support system, not just for me but for Dylan!  My colleagues at work meet me in the bathroom and tell me it's okay to cry.  I have a handful of friends that have always been there and now standing in gap praying, answering their phone when I call.  I have three sisters and a sister n law who call me, and text me just to make sure I am okay.  I have a mom, who 2 years ago I talked to maybe every six months, if that, we now speak either by phone, text, face book, blog posts weekly.  I have an amazing grandma who I call Nanny, who has always picked up the phone.  I have a hometown community who pray for me daily, they send messages of encouragement, messages of hope.  I have friends who I have not talked to in years spend hours on the phone with me listening, crying, laughing.   I serve a faithful God, it has been three months since I asked God for help and he delivered more than I could have imagined. 

Thank you all!  I know that this journey is heavy, it is heartbreaking.  I know there are times when many of you cry while standing in the gap praying, cry after we hang up the phone, cry while we are on the phone.  It is easy to turn away and no one would really blame you, but you don't, you meet me in my place and offer your friendship.  At the end of the day, knowing that I am not alone is an essential ingredient in my healing.  I never thought in just four months God would provide an entire community of friendships, but thankfully our God is bigger than we are and bigger than what we can imagine.

But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. 2 Thessalonians 3:3

7 comments:

  1. You are amazing, and you are very loved.

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  2. God is so faithful. I have tears as I think how He works so wonderfully in our lives. I am blessed to call you friend. And I too am thankful for answered prayers.

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  3. We have never met, but I am inspired by your unwavering faith. Your family is in my prayers; I am so glad you are seeing them being answered.

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  4. I love you so much!! You are a blessing and inspiration to so many. Almost everyday someone tells me how amazing my daughter is. I am proud and humbled to be your mom.

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  5. You once again have touched my heart and God speaks beautiful words of His perfect joy through you. I am so honored that you think so highly of A Hole in My Heart. When God planted that precious seed a little over 5 years ago after my son Robert's death...I never thought it would be what it is today. For me, I look in the mirror and ask "Who are you that God has shown HIS favor and blessings upon you?" I just stand there and cry because He loves me so much and has allowed me the ability to reach out and assist other hurting moms. By earthly standards, I am not anyone special in this world but to God, I am someone He chose. Being obedient is difficult and I fall flat on my face everyday...but HE is there to lift me back up. I have learned that we are ALL vessels in serving Him and I cannot think of anything more humbling to be...but a servant to Him and others. It warms my heart to hear your kind words and I treasure you, our new-found - God created "Divine Appointed" Friendship and sisterhood. You are precious to me! Love you Summer~ Autumn

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  6. What beauty you bring here. All of you.

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