Savior please, I fade so fast. When the days come and the pain last, the distance spreads and our talks become few. I know it's me, it's not you. Help me stand when the fall hurts so bad. It's when I refuse to be weak, trying so hard to be tough that's when your mercy means so much. I called upon my Redeemer from the beginning because today my God, it is You my redeemer that I seek, that I long for. I walk by faith in this darkness and when I loose sight of the very person that is holding me I have to fight my way back some way, some how, back into Your embrace. My God, I cry just like David's cry in Psalm 57:1-3
Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me,
for in you my soul takes refuge;
in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge,
till the storms of destruction pass by.
I cry out to God Most High,
to God who fulfills his purpose for me.
He will send from heaven and save me;
he will put to shame him who tramples on me. SelahGod will send out his steadfast love and his faithfulness!
I will come back to You, You are my strength, You are my joy. Without You this life is unbearable. Time will not pull me away, although at times I may stray...You are my Lord, my Love, my Refuge. In you I have hope. Hope for this mother who misses her child so much but still has to love the child she is blessed to still hold. A wife who must learn to love a whole new way. I praise you for your absolute known presence in my life day to day. The prayers answered, the moments of Your love revealed. I long for the day that you will hold me and I can fall into your embrace and just thank You. Without You here, this season is unbearable, this hope is gone, and the light is covered by the shadows of darkness. I am learning to believe that is in Your arms and Your arms only that I can rest, I do not have to prove a thing.
Please remember this prayer when the words do not come as they so often do not.