Sunday, January 22, 2012

Heartsick


No deep thoughts this morning, no earth shattering grief revelations, just missing my little girl.  The past three days I have been thinking about her non stop.  A constant video of the five months we had together just replaying in my mind.  Cuddling together in the early morning.  After her first bottle, I would always put her in bed with me, when she would get restless I would just pull her close, I miss miss miss that warm cuddly body.  I miss bathing her, putting her in cute little pj's and rocking her to sleep.  I miss picking her up from day care and seeing her eyes light up when she would see me.  I miss those moments with both of my kids, playing laughing loving together like they had always been a part each others lives.  The missing is so sad. 

4 comments:

  1. I know you miss her more than life itself. It is just unimaginable but yet I do feel your pain, I think about it all day and the tightness in my chest is always there. I know it will always be there because it just will! My sweet Kelsie I see your picture everyday, I look at it everytime I walk in my kitchen, sometimees I smile, sometimes tears just come and sometimes I have to just glance and walk away because seeing your beautiful little face is so hard. Maybe one day it will be all smiles everytime, maybe. I love you sweet girl to the moon and back a million times!

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  2. I think about her all the time. Thursday when Pat passed away, all I could think about was that she was going to see Kelsie and I was so jealous. I hear this song and I just want to go see her. I know it is not my time and in that there is joy cuz I know when it is my time I will be with her forevermore. I love you Kelsie. I love you Summer. mom

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  3. My heart is broken for you. Continuing to pray and miss her with you. 2 nights ago when I was tucking Lizzy into bed she said to me through a few tears, "Mom something is bothering me...it is bothering me that Dylan's nice baby from the baseball game is not with her mommy now." I can only imagine how much you miss her when we who barely knew her miss her too. The missing is so sad.

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  4. Love, always love, prayers and thoughts and love and more love for you and yours!

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