Saturday, November 26, 2011

It's a Pinterestmas Christmas

Turkey Trot official time 36:04.  Almost a 35 min 5K.  That was a perfect way to start this Thanksgiving day.  The weather was beautiful and the 3.2 mile run was just what I needed to get me through the day all in one piece.  I really did expect the worse for Thanksgiving.  I pictured myself crouched in a fetal like ball crying all day missing my sweet baby girl.  Well, there was no time for fetal position corner crying.  It was go go go from morning to...1am that morning.  Jeff and my Dad where there to see me at the finish line at the Turkey Trot...that was two biggest fans right there!  Then it was off to the kitchen to do my best to help Heather get Thanksgiving Dinner all cooked up.  We chowed down, then there was a quick break, a fun quiz and then it was off to meet all the crazies for black Friday shopping.

Ok, everyone had me scared out of my mind with the black Friday thing.  It was not that bad.  We had a great time and got some really awesome deals.  Next year it's matching shirts, and boas! 

Today my house as exploded Pinterestmas Christmas.  I have found an outlet in crafting.  I have spent all morning putting my pins to reality.  It's just me, Dylan is still with his dad and Jeff is working.  The house is so quiet, well except for a puppy who terrorizes me.  The down time is tough, but I need days like this to grieve.  To miss her.  I sat in Kelsie's room today and cried as a rocked in her chair.  I made another video, just in case I need to cry again I can watch it.  I guess you can say I am crafting and grieving.  It's good grief, it feels good, it's not angry, it's not unbearable, it's just I miss you, I love you and
geez I wish you were here grief.

Well not a lot depth today, honestly my creativity that I have to use to write has all gone into trying to create.

Thanksgiving was not near as awful as I thought it would be.  I had one meltdown, but no one saw and it was maybe a couple of minutes before I regained composure and joined the festivities.  Life keeps going so keeping balance and putting one foot in front of the other, is truly all you can do.

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